True Story:

When I was a senior in high school, I shaved my head.

I was sick of the female beauty myth and all the pain and misery it was causing everyone.

One day, I walked back into the locker room after I had left gym and heard a group of popular girls (the ones who just sit around in the coaches office and gab) well ... gabbing.

One girl (we’ll call her Vanessa) said, “like, oh my god, did you see Marie’s hair ... I mean her head? That is so disgusting!”

There was general laughter before they noticed I was there.

So Vanessa says, “Tell us Marie, why did you do it?”

I leaned toward her and looked her in the eye and said, “well, Vanessa, the truth is I worship the Pillsbury Dough Boy and I wanted to be just like him.”

I don’t know what they said to each other after that.

I do know, later that year Vanessa told me she admired my courage and we talked about my real reasons, about the female beauty myth, about the unrealistic expectations for perfection, about the absolute absurdity of it all.

I do know that maybe I changed one person’s perspective of beauty and maybe even of herself.

And what more can I ask for?

Everything is Constructed!

What are we supposed to do about all these issues,
all these feelings, all these inadequacies?

I mean, it’s not like we can just change society’s representations
of women or wipe out racism overnight.

Sometimes, it seems there isn’t much we can do
to change the stereotypes propagated by society.

But there are things we can do.

The most important thing we can do

is become aware.

If we are aware, if we are awake, if we are
conscious of the messages we receive, we can
make up our own minds about whether they are
truthful or whether they are constructed.

We can be aware of how everything we see or
hear or read is constructed and how everything
constructed is constructed for a reason.

We can ask ourselves: what is their reason?

This journal is constructed.

I purposefully picked out information I felt would be
thought-provoking and which was important in learning
how to become aware of the messages in our society
that can be toxic to our sense of self.

I put a lot of thought into how to set this journal up,
how to use color to make it more appealing,
how much of my own experiences to share,
how much room to leave you to respond.

Not everything that is constructed is designed
to make us feel we need something more
than what we have.

My hope for this journal is that it will help you realize

that you already have everything you could possibly need.

But, just like you can see how this journal was constructed
with a goal in mind, you can also see how everything
is constructed with some goal in mind.

And it is important that you see how the negative messages,
the ones that make you feel inept or inadequate
are constructed to create a need you probably
don’t really have.

I hope this colorful little construction of mine has been
helpful in aiding you in your quest to become aware.

I hope you have come away from this experience,
not only with a greater understanding of all the forces
at work behind the media, but with a greater
understanding of yourself.

There is no one in the world, no matter how much they try,

who can fill the hole inside of you, except you.

But the sense of wholeness, of being real, of being true
to yourself, that you gain is something that is worth the effort.

Good Luck!